I'm a flake

Since graduating high school (and I guess I'll see the trend soon since I just graduated college), my circle of friends have diminished. And I honestly do think a big part of it has to do with me. Obviously, I know people that are bigger flakes than me, but that doesn't make me any less of a flake. Other than a solid core of friends that I feel really comfortable with, sometimes I don't really want to call people to hang out. And I'll half ass it, like instead of returning their calls, I'll shoot them a text. While a few of them instances were with people that I thought our college experiences changed us and I felt somewhat uncomfortable hanging out with them. Others, no good reason other than I guess I didn't care as much as I thought I did. And it's sad to think about it. Because as this chapter closed, I still care and I want to know how they are and what they are up to now. If I thought it was hard to call them a year ago for whatever reason, it's not any easier to call them now. That being said, I do like my "scrappy" friends (as Phoebe described Monica when Phoebe tried to cut her out of her life). However, I'm not purposely trying to cut people out of my life. I already have a hard enough time returning calls and for people that I'm close to, but not super close to, I just have a hard time. And I apologize for that. It's not anything against anyone, merely a flaw of mine. So if you sense this is happening, be scrappy! I appreciate those who are bolder than me.

And I will try to call one or two people that I'm thinking about in the post and see what they are up. :)

Thoughts..

Haven't actually sat down with my thoughts in awhile. Which is funny (not ironic) considering how much time I have on my hands. Just started an internship with The Green Chamber of San Diego, it's pretty neat and it's right up in my alley. Haven't really done much yet, but it's a good start.

Moved out from Davis, all my things are in boxes in the living room and garage. I always say I'll unpack tomorrow, and then go down and see everything and proceed to delay it. I figure I'll slowly go down and grab what I need and unpack like that. Or I can just try to move out as fast as I can, so I don't need to unpack. Someone find me a job? :D

Anyways, I'm sick and I'm pretty sure in the past few days I've drank my weight in honey and lemon water. It's not too bad except I'm congested and always get cough attacks right before I try to sleep. But literally, I bought a bottle of honey (16 ounces, the bottle is surprisingly small!) yesterday and I've already gone through half of it. I was trying to figure out how much sugar I've consumed solely from honey. Diabetes?

I have practice tomorrow, but not sure how much I'll actually be able to play especially if I can't breathe through my nose. It's refreshing playing on a different team because I fulfill a totally different role. It's a welcome change. A little bummed out that I'm sick because I really want to practice. Labor Day is next week, and I'm ready to play!

Last week in Davis = SUCCESS.

My Future Status: Pending

What's scary is that I still don't know what I want to do. People ask me where I'm applying. And I'm honestly just applying to whatever right now. Including some research/lab positions, administrative positions, non profit organizations, and any entry level social science position at some firm that I'm somewhat qualified for. And I feel like I could easily fall into a career that I didn't choose but fell into because it was the first place that hired me.

Job seeking can be tiring. But I recently got my credit card bill ($900+), and that gave me a spurt of energy that I didn't know I had.

And So It Begins..

Looking for jobs.. Job-hunting is hard, or maybe I'm not doing it right. Or perhaps both.

Though I may "grown up," but I have very recently been diagnosed with Bieber Fever. However, don't expect me going to his concert any time soon.

I need more friends in SD. I need a supporting crowd for some debauchery. :)

I'll be back in Davis next week until August when I move home for good (or until I find a job...).

Looks my ultimate career is not over. And the Mixed vs. Women question is answered. Women's. Though Metro was a really awesome team and had fun with them, but I decided not to try out further with them.

And I might have been over 45 minutes late to Knock Out's try-out/practice. It was odd since for the past 2 years, I was captain and therefore could not be late and pretty much was never late (I think..).

Packing is a pain. But even more so is unpacking.

Now that I have no obligations or responsibilites, I live life rather spontaneously. Maybe spontaneously isn't the right word.. I'm just super desparate to not be doing nothing, that I'll do anything eagerly and without much thought.

Boys are confusing.

I had Chipotle for the second time. First time was when I was a freshman in college. I might have had a little too much fun after the first time which resulted in my burrito being in the trash/floor/toilet (actually, I don't think I made it to the toilet the first time I was.. intoxicated). So never had a good impression of Chipotle. And also, I grew up eating Mexican food from SD. Legit.

And my last week of college was... amazing.

LASTS

I'm doing my last HOMEWORK ever for my LAST class EVER. omg. what?

Cheers to the real world! (I'll probably regret saying that quite shortly..)

Off Season?

Regionals was earlier this month. Finished 8th. Had some good moments, had some bad. 4 years of ultimate.. came to an end. Some expectations were met, some weren't. But all in all, I'm done with college ultimate. Team voted on new captains, and I think they'll be awesome as they are already taking over most of the responsibility. But I ran into a rookie at the library last night, and we give them a hard time saying that they're not a crustie (a Pleiade vet) yet, and won't be until fall. Anyways, I ran into a rookie, and she asked, "Why weren't you at pick-up, captain?" and I smugly replied, "I'm not captain anymore." And she goes, "Hey! If I'm still a rookie, then you're still captain!" LOL. She got me.

So now that I'm done with college ultimate, what's next? Honestly, I don't know. Club's on my mind, but I have to make sure my body can take it. And then.. women's or coed? At this point of my "career," after 4 years, and 3 years of rebuilding, I feel like I need something to show off for the past years--some sort of accomplishment. And though placing/making it far (aka nationals) isn't all that matter, but it has always been a goal of mine. But ultimately, I want to join a team that I can actively learn from and that benefit from me. I know I have a lot to learn, 4 years in college means nothing in club, and I've never actually played club. And if club doesn't work out this year.. then that's okay too. I've had a good 4 years, and maybe it's time to take a break. :)