Who I Am

I think I need to rethink the priorities in my life. I feel like I've lost my focus a bit. While I've discovered new things that I love, I feel like it's taking away everything else from my life. It's making me lose focus from what's really important.

I need to get my priorities straight, and maybe then I'll be happier with my life. It's hard to choose between one thing and another. But right now, I'm not happy with myself nor my life.

And hopefully one day, I'll be proud of who I am and what I've done. To achieve that I need to rethink aspects of my life.

Whatever

So sick of life and everything. Getting emo again. Blah.

Back to studying.

Whatever

Still a little bit sick. Got it checked out earlier this week, not mono. Woo. But this is getting annoying. Anyways, still injured for ultimate. Practiced for the first time on Thursday. Ankle was definitely not at 100% and hurt afterwards. I think I'm going to sit out for final weeks pick-up. And maybe Fools. But either way I was only going to play one day at Fools.

Practice was okay, first time I played since Stanford Qualifier, so almost two weeks. My pull looked really good, but I only pulled once. Sai let me be a cutter for one point. It was... different. Haha. Back to the old days, I think I like handling better now.. The truth comes out. Well, I don't know, maybe if I got to cut a bit more again. Then we worked on trap-zone. That was fun, but I think we definitely need to perfect it more.

I had an oral final for Chinese on Friday, but it's individual and it was taking a while, so lots of people had class. So she was hesitant but then decided to let people come back next week if they had class. I didn't have class, but I was very unprepared. I was going to stay and just get it over with, but then I realized that if I only studied for 10 minutes, I probably would be better off. So I just left, but I still haven't started studying. Oh well.

And sprinnng break! Sickness: leave my body!

Buy!

New Cleats! Originally $175. However, it was on clearance at nike.com and only size left was 6.5 which happens to be my size. Got marked down to 59.99. Plus tax and shipping, total comes out to be $73.26 which is still super good. It's made with kangaroo leather which supposedly is super good. Feels somewhat.. unethical. Haha. It's the same model as the cleats I have now, but I guess slightly better because of the materials. Last pair cost $50ish, got them at the outlets. But I'm going to send them back to Nike cuz there's cracks in it, and hopefully get a voucher for my next pair or whatever.

Next on the to-buy list.. North Face Recon. Looks like it'll be 78/79 bucks. So close to buying it, but I should at least to try to save some money in the meantime. So tempting!!

Still sick, people are scaring me into thinking that I have mono. I think I'm going to go to the health center again next week. Even though they are completely incompetent. And I also have this weird tumorous bump on my knee. I remember falling on it pretty hard going after a disc, and usually it swells up and is all fluid-y. But this bump is rock hard, it's like an extra knee cap or something. Can't be good. Really hurts too.

North Face Recon: to buy or not to buy? I know I can hold off getting the iPod, cuz I already have one. Well, I guess I already have a backpack... Ugh.

EDIT: I just bought an iPod. Damn, so much for self control. But I got the 2nd generation one (the one without the video because I don't know how to download videos) and it's only 160 as opposed to 200. So I guess I really need to hold off on that Recon backpack until at least my next paycheck which should come within 10 days or so.. Man, I need to save up!

Materialistic Goods

I want a Northface backpack. And an iPod. Need more $$

Oh, and I need new cleats. Bottoms of both feet are cracked. No idea how I cracked plastic on grass.

Northface Heckler, Recon, or Sweeper!

Sick and Injured

Still sick. And rolled my ankle like 3 times. On crutches now. Fun.

First day of Stanford, sat out completely for the first game against Stanford B. And then played against Sonoma and Arizona. I think I did alright. Definitely could have done better had I been able to breathe. Haha. But I was just super congested that I was getting short on breathe. And for this one point I was in as mid, and it was soooo hard. People on the sideline saw that I was struggling to breathe and were asking me if I needed an injury sub, but I just switched to wing.

Played all day today. Lost to Caltech. Absolutely pathetic. Last game against Simon Fraiser, I rolled or turned on my ankle funny 3 times. Once was one a forehand fake, and I just turned it badly, but I played on cuz it didn't seem that bad after. And it was fine, I was still able to run and play. But then on D, I had rolled it pretty bad, and I was just kind of on the ground.. as opposed to putting the mark on, but I got up and put the mark on and kept playing. And the third time was cutting upline in the endzone, got up and landed funny. All on the same ankle. Definitely swollen, and unable to walk on it. Great.

And we got 11th at Qualifier which is worse than how we did at Invite last year (9th). After the first day when we were 2-1, I thought we were doing well, and had a good shot of making Invite. I was going to buy a jersey for myself had we made it as a prize cuz I would have felt like I would've earned it. But so much for that. Oh well, there's always next year. I look forward to how this team will be like next year.

For now, I will try to get better.. And have my throat not hurt that much.. Blah.